Ipswich Town - The reason World War II was won!

                           IPSWICH TOWN - SAVIOURS OF THE WESTERN WORLD!

Good old Ipswich Town. The Suffolk Club gave us managers like Alf Ramsey, Bobby Robson and an East Anglian derby which always seems to produce at least 16 goals in the one game. However the club have a more grandiose claim to fame in my opinion.

Ipswich Town basically won World War II.

Yes contrary to watch you may think, but only for the likes of John Wark, Russell Osman, and our own Kevin O Callaghan, it’s debatable whether the Allies would have had the strength and courage to plough through World War 2, defeat Adolf Hitler and come out on top.

You may think it was a combination of U.S and Russian military firepower mixed with the backbone of the British Army, but I think you’re a tad wide of the mark!

Because when half the Ipswich Town squad played a part in Escape To Victory (the brilliant 1981 John Huston film) the Tractor Boys turned the momentum of not only a game the Allies where being hammered in, but the moment that proved the turning point in the War that gave hope to Russia, England and the States to conquer the nasty Germans and insure World peace!

Throw in Paul Cooper (stand in for Sly Stallone) along with Kevin Beattie (who practically doubled everything on the pitch for fat Michael Caine and probably would have done a better job acting in the film as well) and if the result was ever in doubt you could always count on the German goalkeeper (Laurie Sivell) to let one in at the other end. That’s right – even he was playing for Ipswich Town at the time!

Put all these facts together and you see I’m right folks.

Basically Ipswich where responsible for the only feel good moment of the entire Second World War!

The film tells the story of how nasty Max Von Sydow (he’s an ex-German footballer with a sideline in imprisoning anyone who’s not German, or maybe Austrian) comes up with the idea of playing a match between the Allies and their nemesis in a vain attempt to get away from the atrocities that surround them. For this he contacts Colby (played unfortunately by Michael Caine) and asks him to gather together a team worthy of facing the Germans. With transfers not really an option, Colby has to work with what he has in the camp. That consists of some over-the-hill ex-footballers, an American loudmouth (Sly Stallone), and Irishman (Kevin O Callaghan) and some traillist by the name of Pele.

So what a handy coincidence it is then than half the Ipswich Town squad have been captured by the Nazi’s and end up in the same prison camp! With this amazing stroke of luck, Caine puts together a team destined to do battle with the nasty Germans in what would seem like a meaningless friendly.

However Stallone and the gang have different ideas and plan a daring escape, due to be pulled off at half-time when the resistance would dig a tunnel under their dressing room (which probably would have taken longer than the entire Second World War to actually complete) and flee to safety, leaving the Germans confused, no second half, and the Nazi army wanting to shot Van Sydow for the idiot arranging the game in the first place!

Everything was going to plan in training until O’Callaghan has his arm broken (Luck of the Irish my arse) so that Stallone can play, enabling him to lead the escape at half-time. Everything is all set for one of the greatest (if slightly made-up) games of football ever witnessed.

With Sly Stallone in goal, Michael Caine's men were always going to concede (unless Sly was allowed go all John Rambo on their ass and blow them away) but with the talent they had further forward a high-scoring encounter was nailed on.

With Bobby Moore at the back, along with Osman. Ossie Ardiles and Mike Summerbee pulling the strings in midfield along with the likes of Wark , and Pele causing havoc in the hole it should have been a walk in the park for the Allies, but a combination of unbelievably biased refereeing and some joke goalkeeping from Rambo meant the goodies were 4-1 down to the baddies The crowd were despondent, the Germans elated as cunning Max Von Sydow looked on from the stands with a brown envelope  and the promise of a couple of hookers for the ref after the game .

Facing an awful beating, several more goals (not to mention bread and water back in a P.O.W. camp for the next five years) Sly decided it was time for action. When the going got tough – Sly ran down a tunnel under the dressing room swimming pool and made a dart for freedom. The Ipswich lads were having none of it!

The Allies, to their credit, opted to finish the match – bringing it back from 4-1 to just one goal with two efforts before the hour and with Pele (who was in a sling at half-time!) scoring an astonishing overhead kick (replayed 26 times by the movie's director) and Rocky saving a penalty late on, they did a runner as the 1940s crowd, dressed in 1970s clothes (note to director), carried them to freedom.

Soon after the war ended, The Allies won and half the Ipswich squad was released from the prison camp to resume trying to beat Norwich City twice a season. Even the nasty Laurie Sivell who had kept goal for the Germans was welcomed back with open arms after he admitted he’d let Ardiles score twice and said he could have saved Pele’s effort but for some mud in his eye.

A successful draw, a war eventually won and that nasty Hitler topping himself. Could it have been better? Of course it could ....had one Deigo Armando Maradona had been in the side.... the Allies would have won.